The Hunters
Journal Entry #4: It has been 10 weeks since the outbreak, and civilization was destroyed. Life as we know it was changed. Cities became wretched places; filled with grass growing through the asphalt and buildings. Emptiness amongst the buildings gave you the feeling that you were alone. The countryside was barren. All that remains on the planet was the survivors and the hunters…
The hunters were the main reason for the almost complete destruction of the human race. Around 5 billion people have been killed already. What makes the Hunters unique is that they are an unknown species. From what is known, the Hunters are a type of organism that can infect any type of life form. Some of which include, plants, animals, people, and fish. What is most recognizable about them is that once something is infected they receive incredible strength and intelligence. Their main goal is to pursue and kill so that they can pass on the infection to your corpse.
Journal Entry #5: I just stumbled across and old abandoned cabin in the middle of a forest. It seems like a safe place to stay for now. There is bedding here and also food. Looks as if there may be some kind of camp here.
“I have no time to worry if there or others I must focus on my mission.” Saying aloud to myself.
Later that night, I was awoken by the sound of leaves crunching near the cabin. As I peeked through the window saw 2 figures coming toward the cabin. I couldn't tell if they were bad, but I decided to hide inside a closest in the room. As they all came into the cabin I could her one of them shout, “Finally! We are back from that supply run and got some great stuff. I’m going to go put up.”
“AHHHH!!” he screamed. “What the heck are you doing in here? You almost got yourself killed. What is your name!”?
I answered. “My name is Clem and I’m the daughter of Dr. Richard Murphy. Sorry to intrude. I just needed a place to stay they night before I go back out on my mission. “
“Mission? The man responded. “What kind of mission are you on? Aren't you like 10 years old little girl?” “Actually I’m 12. What is your name?”
“Well my name is Kenny,” he responded. “Well anyways, what about this mission? What are you trying to do?
“Before my dad died. He found a way to kill of the Hunters forever. All I have to do is make my way up north east and find the castle that has the machine to detonate this special EMP bomb I have.” I said, with a bit of fright.
“Ok, lets go!” Kenny said, “I’ll help.”
As the two went start their journey, they headed north. A couple hours passed and there was still not anything in sight. Not knowing really where to go Kenny and I found a big bridge, which they could rest for the night. Once they there, as they started to sit down, a group of vampire bat came flying out. There were at least 200 of them and some of them started to circle us. We began to run. If they were to bit us then we could either die or become infected and turned into a hunter. We ran until they stopped chasing us. After, we came across a small cave where we stayed the night.
Journal Entry #6: After my crazy night with the bats, Kenny and I were forced to walk east because there was a big mountain in the way. We came across an abandoned laboratory 3 or so hours later. I thought for sure that this was the place I needed to be.
As we searched the Lab we continued to look for the machine needed to use, but it was nowhere to be found. I was split up from Kenny searching somewhere else. I went to go find him but he was gone. I raced to he entrance and I saw people tie him up and race on foot with him over the shoulder. There was nothing I could do they were so far away.
I am alone.
After walking for a few more days. I came across a huge house. It must have been the castle my dad was talking about but it looked strange. I walked up to the entry and opened the door. The squeak from the door echoed throughout the place. It was extremely dark and quiet inside.
Suddenly I heard a noise. It was a strange moaning sound. I couldn’t tell where it was coming from, but it was getting louder and louder. I tried to light up the room with a lighter I had but it was not working. As I keep trying to brighten up the room, the sound kept getting louder and louder!
“Flick…..Flick.. NO! Please! No! Flick…
Part 1
(By: burzinski)
Authors note:
This story is inspired by Tom Gauld. He
made the picture called the Map of the Area
Surrounding Our Holiday Home. What I like the most about this picture is
that many different stories can be told from it. This picture from Tom Gauld
has the potential to tell an infinite amount of stories. In my point of view
the area around the cabin looks almost apocalyptic to me. When I look at this
picture I see a desolate place, with little hope. I also was thinking of the
hit show “Walking Dead”. This is where I
wanted to derive my story from, and with all the other random scary items in
the area, it seemed best to make it a thriller. One of my biggest goals for
creating this story was to provide suspense. I wanted the reader to feel
anxious and scared when reading my story. My story ends abruptly because I
wanted to try and scare the reader. I
tried to evoke a sense of danger while reading. Hopefully sometime in the
future I will be able to write a part 2 for this story!
P.S This story was my first story
ever posted in this class, and it is crazy to see how far I have come since
this post.
Anthony,
ReplyDeletewhat a creative mind you have! I never expected something like this and certainly could not have come up with it myself! I really liked that you had the journal entries to preface each event. It definitely gave a sense of connection to the main character.
Logistically, there are a lot of grammar and spelling errors. One that especially stuck out to me was the tense of your verbs. For example, the sentence "All that remains on the planet was the survivors and the hunters…". You have two verbs in this sentence but they are different tenses. "Remains" is present tense, and "was" is past tense. You could have said "All that remains on the planet are the survivors and the hunters" or "All that remained on the planet were the survivors and the hunters". The first has both verbs in the present tense and the second have both verbs in the past. If you ever need help proofreading, feel free to send it my way! I know it seems miniscule, but those kinds of mistakes can take away from the story itself!
But overall I thought you did a great job! I look forward to seeing more of your posts.
You are so creative! I like how you used the Journal Entries to show that he is telling the story. For some reason the first part I thought it was going to be like an apocalypse kind of thing. The Hunters killing 5 billion people.... sounds like the Walking Dead. Either way your story was interesting and thrilling. I had fun reading it. Although the comment above is kind of true, you need to fix some errors.
ReplyDeleteI really liked the concept of your story, Anthony. Like you said in your author's note it's amazing how many stories you can make from just a map. It did have a bit of 'The Walking Dead' feel like Christine said. I also liked the journal entries that were scattered throughout the story.
ReplyDeleteLike Christina and Christine said, there were some typos scattered throughout. One that really caught my attention besides the ones mentioned already was the 8th paragraph, where there was a missing quote mark. "Mission?" The man responded. It's not a big mistake but it just interrupted the flow of the story some.
But overall I loved the idea and format that you used for the story! I'm looking forward to reading more in the future.